My grandmother, who I call Mummy with love, took her last breath on 9thJuly 2018. She was 83. Our whole lives have revolved around her. She took a part of us when she left, and for that, we can never be whole again.
Mummy was blessed; even when she started aging, she was rarely ill. When some of her peers went in and out of hospitals for treatment, she never did. Only in her last week, her old age got the better of her and her body started to shut down, one organ at a time.
I did not get to see her during her last days. I’m rather unsure whether this was a blessing or otherwise. The last time I saw her, I hugged her tight and told her I’d make another trip back to my childhood home with Sid, my little boy who Mummy loved beyond life itself. In a way, the last memory I have of her is a hearty, healthy, aging woman throwing some shade at an Indian serial whilst munching on some bread.
She was always full of love and the days after her passing was when we all truly found out just how much exactly she was cherished by everyone; including our daily groceryman, LPG salesman, our neighbors, her friends, my friends and so many others. For those who did not know her, if you’d like, reading this piece of tribute would bring you a step closer into understanding the life she led.
All of my favorite memories cannot be put into a single blog post. Therefore, I shall revisit only those I can put into words.
My brother, Hitesh and I were practically raised by our grandmother as our mom has been a working woman all her life. Mummy used to tell us stories, only in the format of Cinderella and Mickey Mouse, as we insisted frequently. Even as I grew up, she’d still remember making up stories about how Mickey Mouse went to the market/zoo/school/mall/overseas and met Minnie Mouse.
There was a time when my brother, mummy and I were at McDonald’s having her favorite, vanilla ice cream in a cone. Remember the time when that ice cream was Rp. 500,- only? Mummy accidentally spilled hers and went on and on about how she wasted food and money. Naturally, my brother and I being her #1 bullies, teased her continually about the fact that she made a mountain out of a molehill. This bullying went on for many many years later!
On random days, all of us would take her out for a drive to go for McD’s Drive Thru service to enjoy another one of her favorites; apple pie. In spite of it being so tiny, she used to offer us her pie and we’d need to repeatedly say no before she’d finally enjoy it herself.
Mummy was allergic to mushrooms. Even a tiny bite of it would send her back and forth to puke, which is a terrible ordeal, especially for her age. Whenever we’d order pizza, she’d request one without mushrooms. Even when it came, she’d recheck the order so many times. Sometimes we wonder if she trusted us! Haha!
Her version of Netflix is the saas-bahu (Mother-in-law/daughter-in-law) Indian serials on television. Now, if you’re a fan of these, don’t be hating on me, but these serials annoy me. They used to annoy mummy as well. But since she lacked options for other entertainment (I did offer her to watch Friends, but she claims the language is weird haha), she’d watch them anyway. But the best part is her commentary. She used to comment on the outfits, jewelries, mannerisms, make-up and dialogues. One most epic comment was “Kirti, lihat aja ini orang. BEGO!” which translates to “Look at this stupid woman”. That got my brother and I in splits, looking at her bewildered expression.
Whenever I’d tell Mummy I was going to Kelapa Gading Mall, she would always say in Sindhi, “please buy the round bread” from BreadTalk. The term she used was “gol bread”. The first time she asked for it, I kept wondering about this famous “gol” bread until I finally realized she meant round. To this date, I still buy it and have some in her memory.
Sindhi cultures typically advice Mondays to be kept as vegetarian days. Now, I must say, my brother, my father and I are quite rebellious about this. Our argument was, what was the point of being vegetarian for ONE day? When I finally came clean to my grandmother that I don’t always follow this norm, she was super cool about it and said in Sindhi “You eat whatever you want. If there’s such a thing as a sin, I’ll take it. Chill”. Now how many grandmothers think as forward as she did? Most people frown at me when I order a grilled chicken on Mondays.
The person she loves the most as she got older? That’d be my mother, her daughter-in-law. My mom took care of her like her own mother, fulfilling her every wish, down to small requests such as a pair of new footwear, a new coin pouch and so on. Even my father would proudly announce, that Mummy had a taaaaaddd bit more love for mom!
How to make her laugh? Switch on America’s Funniest Home Videos featuring cats and dogs. She used to laugh and exude so much gas, burping away the laughter! Seeing her reaction was funnier than the actual videos. Another show to guarantee her laughter; Wiped Out! She had a blast watching people fall into slime or get hit by a rubber turbine.
She was one of the best chefs I know. Hailing from India, she cooks the absolute best chicken biryani. Also, somehow, no one fries fish the way she did. Over time, she learnt Indonesian cooking to make Hitesh and I happy little eaters with her super memorable ayam lada soup (pepper chicken soup), bakso (meatballs) and tempura satay.
She passed a week after my parents relocated to a new home. She barely got to enjoy the new place. Her room was made so tastefully by my parents, with her personal TV, gorgeous wallpaper design that is so appropriate for her taste, a chest of drawers close enough to her bed and a lovely view of the area. Until date, it is kept intact, simply because no one has the heart to take it down as yet.
It is an understatement to say that we miss her. She made our house a home. My friends loved her, and she loved them as much. Sid still asks for her, when he sees her picture. I hope he never forgets her. Because a soul like hers, was so warm, and exuded so much happiness from all of us. Living in her memory is always going to be painful as she played such a big role in all of our lives. But, we keep going, because that’s what she would have wanted us to do.
Good night, Mummy. We love and always will <3 nbsp="" o:p="">
Sweet dreams, angel.
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